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Skateboarding DVD Video Review:Tony Hawk's Secret Skatepark Tour

Tony Hawk's Secret Skatepark Tour - DVD Skateboarding Snowboarding skateboard snowboard DVD Video Review

Director:
Studio: 900 Films
Released: 2004
Rating: 3 Stars

Staring:
Tony Hawk, Bob Burnquist, Rodney Mullen, Shaun White, Bam Margera, Donny Barley, Alex Chalmers, Mike Escamilla, Kerry Getz, Ryan Sheckler, Brian Sumner, Mike Vallely, Riley Hawk, Shaun Stulz.

Tony Hawk has mastered the art of entertainment... or so I thought. From his Gigantic Skatepark Tours to the Boom Boom Huck Jams, he knows how to entertain in an insane live environment and then translate that insanity to a post-production DVD. Not as much with this one, though.

This has got to be his best creative idea yet. Gather up a bunch of pro skaters and randomly drop in on various skate parks across the country - unannounced! What would happen? If it were my local park, I'm pretty sure I'd call everyone I know and perhaps some people I don't even know. Wouldn't you?

The crew picked parks they had heard of or seen on the internet and wanted to experience. There was no structure or expectation. You can't be late or behind schedule if no one knows you're coming. It was an opportunity for the pros to ride parks in a relaxed, non-demo mode and just have fun with the locals.

I thought I had this disc figured out. The Quicksilver tour bus rolls in, Tony gets out and mayhem ensues as thousands of kids descend on the park as cellphone usage skyrockets. Sounds reasonable, but I found the DVD to show quite the opposite. There were people at each park, but they seemed to just sit idly watching the pros zip around doing their thing.

Where were all the rabid fans? The autograph hounds? Kids who just wanted to say they saw Tony Hawk in person? I do not know. Sure there were some folks who were really stoked to have the tour roll in, but the insanity I would have expected did not appear on film. From July 3 through July 17, 2003 the Secret Skatepark Tour seemed to be just that... a secret.

Skateparks on the Tour

...not including the ones in the bonus area.

Paradise Valley Skatepark in Phoenix, AZ - Outdoor park.
Vans Skatepark in AZ - Indoor park.
Chandler Skatepark in AZ - Outdoor park.
Tucson Skatepark in Tucson, AZ - indoor ramps.
Carolina Skatepark in El Paso, TX - Outdoor park.
Los Altos Skatepark in NM - Outdoor park.
Cavalry Skatepark in NM - Outdoor park.
Pep Boys Skatepark in NM - Outdoor park without lights.
Trinidad Skatepark in CO - Outdoor park.
Scott Carpenter Skatepark in Boulder, CO - Outdoor park.
Edora Skatepark in CO - Outdoor park.
Hailey Skatepark in CO - Big outdoor park.
Skatepark in boise, ID - Outdoor park.
Skatepark in Fresno, CA - Outdoor park.
Woodward Skatepark in Tehachapi, CA - indoor/outdoor park.

Of note was the attempt at the Vans park in AZ to try and cook an egg on a manhole cover. The temperature was 117°. Apparently eggs do not cook at this temperature, they only smell awful. For those who may want to replicate this astonishing feat... most foods need about 160° to begin properly cooking. Some require more heat than that. Keep in mind that water boils at 212° F. So leaving food on a 117° manhole is similar to leaving food out on the counter on a hot day. The only thing that cooks up is diarrhea.

Having Rodney Mullen on the tour creates 2 things. Amazing freestyle tricks and insane anxiety. This guy has taken skateboarding so far and done so well with his own skate company, it's hard to believe how much weird anxiety he has floating around his head. Check out Rodney's book, The Mutt: How to Skateboard and Not Kill Yourself, for a deeper look into the psychosis of Rodney.

Tony gets some flack about his age, but would you believe that Rodney Mullen is older than Tony? It's true... according to Hawk. Tony's goal on the Tour was to do a 540 at every stop no matter how small the terrain. He was successful until he tweaked his ankle at the Trinidad park in CO. But that was a small deal compared to splitting his shin open - to the bone - at the Hailey park in CO. It was also at Hailey that Bam joined up with the tour. He must have been busy jumping off balconies.

The only stop on the tour that really had any sort of fan-uproar was at the park in Boise, ID. This was also the only planned stop on the tour. Gee whiz, I guess the word finally got out when they had weeks of advance notice. This is also where Bob Burnquist joins the tour.

Mike Escamilla probably got the most footage since he was the token BMX guy. In a sea of skaters, it's always easy to stand out when you're on a bike. In all fairness, he rounded things out very well and did tons of amazing tricks. He brought a good diversity to the overall menu.

In my undying devotion to Mike Vallely - he skated his ass off at each of the stops. He's an amazing skater with super-human energy. I hope that didn't come off as too gay. I'm just a fan.

This DVD is only searchable by state, not by park. This makes finding and viewing your favorite park a bit of a pain in the ass.

Tony Hawk has mastered the art of entertainment... or so I thought. From his Gigantic Skatepark Tours to the Boom Boom Huck Jams, he knows how to fucking entertain in an insane live environment and then translate that insanity to a post-production DVD. Not as much with this one, though.

This has got to be his best fucking idea yet. Gather up a bunch of pro skaters and randomly drop in on various skate parks across the country - unannounced! What would happen? If it were my local park, I'm pretty sure I'd call everyone I fucking know and perhaps some people I don't even fucking know. Wouldn't you?

I thought I had this disc figured out. The Quicksilver tour bus rolls in, Tony gets out and fucking mayhem ensues as thousands of kids descend on the park as cellphone usage skyrockets. Sounds reasonable, but I found the DVD to show quite the opposite. There were people at each park, but they seemed to just sit idly watching the pros zip around doing their thing.

Where were all the rabid fans? The autograph hounds? Kids who just wanted to say they saw Tony Hawk in person? I do not fucking know. Sure there were some folks who were really stoked to have the tour roll in, but the insanity I would have expected did not appear on film. From July 3 through July 17, 2003 the Secret Skatepark Tour seemed to be just that... a fucking secret.

Skateparks on the Tour

...not including the ones in the fuckingbonus area.

Paradise Valley Skatepark in Phoenix, AZ - Outdoor park.
Vans Skatepark in AZ - Indoor park.
Chandler Skatepark in AZ - Outdoor park.
Tucson Skatepark in Tucson, AZ - indoor ramps.
Carolina Skatepark in El Paso, TX - Outdoor park.
Los Altos Skatepark in NM - Outdoor park.
Cavalry Skatepark in NM - Outdoor park.
Pep Boys Skatepark in NM - Outdoor park without lights.
Trinidad Skatepark in CO - Outdoor park.
Scott Carpenter Skatepark in Boulder, CO - Outdoor park.
Edora Skatepark in CO - Outdoor park.
Hailey Skatepark in CO - Big outdoor park.
Skatepark in boise, ID - Outdoor park.
Skatepark in Fresno, CA - Outdoor park.
Woodward Skatepark in Tehachapi, CA - indoor/outdoor park.

Of note was the attempt at the Vans park in AZ to try and cook an egg on a manhole cover. The temperature was 117°. Apparently eggs do not cook at this temperature, they only smell like shit. For those who may want to replicate this astonishing feat... most foods need about 160° to begin properly cooking. Some require more heat than that. Keep in mind that water boils at 212° F. So leaving food on a 117° manhole is similar to leaving food out on the fucking counter on a hot day. The only thing that cooks up is diarrhea.

Having Rodney Mullen on the tour creates 2 things. Amazing freestyle tricks and insane fucking anxiety. This guy has taken skateboarding so far and done so well with his own skate company, it's hard to believe how much fucked up anxiety he has floating around his head. Check out Rodney's book, The Mutt: How to Skateboard and Not Kill Yourself, for a deeper look into the psychosis of Rodney.

Tony gets some flack about his age, but would you believe that Rodney Mullen is older than fucking Tony? It's true... according to Hawk. Tony's goal on the Tour was to do a 540 at every stop no matter how small the terrain. He was successful until he tweaked his ankle at the Trinidad park in CO. But that was a small deal compared to splitting his shin open - to the fucking bone - at the Hailey park in CO. It was also at Hailey that Bam joined up with the tour. He must have been busy jumping off fucking balconies.

The only stop on the tour that really had any sort of fan-uproar was at the park in Boise, ID. This was also the only planned stop on the tour. Gee whiz, I guess the word finally got out when they had fucking weeks of advance notice. This is also where Bob Burnquist joins the tour.

Mike Escamilla probably got the most footage since he was the token BMX guy. In a sea of skaters, it's always easy to stand out when you're on a fucking bike. In all fairness, he rounded things out very well and did tons of amazing tricks. He brought a good diversity to the overall menu.

In my undying devotion to Mike Vallely - he skated his fucking ass off at each of the stops. He's an amazing skater with super-human energy. I hope that didn't come off as too fucking gay. I'm just a fucking fan.

This DVD is only searchable by state, not by park. This makes finding and viewing your favorite park a fucking pain in the ass.